BARELLAN coach Alex Lawder is coming to terms with the possibility he has played his last game.
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Lawder went down with a knee injury in Saturday's 20-point loss to The Rock-Yerong Creek at Victoria Park and a trip to the physio on Monday delivered the news he feared.
The 37-year-old has a suspected torn anterior cruciate ligament (ACL), medial collateral ligament (MCL) and meniscus damage, an injury that will spell the end of his season and, most likely, his career.
Lawder concedes he has probably played his last game.
"Yeah to be honest, I knew I was always coming to the back end of my playing days eventually and something like this, I can't see myself coming back to play footy again and if I was to come back and play footy again, it's going to take a bit of time," Lawder said.
"In my head, the last day, I've come to terms with that I may not be able to play footy ever again but I was also told that after I broke my shoulder last year so never say never."
Lawder will have the injury confirmed in coming days via an MRI scan but acknowledged his season is over, at the very least.
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But the second-season Barellan coach still has a role to play in the Two Blues' push for finals.
"I've had a whole range of emotions over the last couple of days but the positive is that I can still be involved and still coach, I've still got a voice, I can still make an impact and still push towards getting some wins and pushing for finals," he said.
"It is what it is. Every footy player has got to be prepared for injuries so I'm not going to let it defeat me."
Lawder was named in the Farrer League Team of the Year at full-back last year and has only missed the one game so far this season as an integral member of the Barellan backline.
Lawder is confident however he can easily be replaced.
"I messaged all my leaders (Monday) night because everyone's been asking me flat out what's happening and I just said, the positive is I'm just an old bloke that just yells a lot on the footy field so I can be easily replaced," he said.
"I've just got to be positive and if I'm moping around, dragging my feet everyone else will feed off that. So I'll stay positive and try not to let it impact anybody else."
The 20-point gallant loss to TRYC last Saturday was the Two Blues' third defeat in a row and dropped them to fifth position on the ladder.
Barellan did have Hugh McKenzie, Lucas Irvin and Emerson Cody all pull out between Friday night and Saturday morning leading into the TRYC game.
They will all return for Saturday's home game against Coleambally, but they do lose Mick Fiore for a month to an overseas holiday.
Despite only now hanging onto their spot in the top five by two points, Lawder is not concerned by the position Barellan finds themselves in.
"The four games we've lost now, they were against Marrar, the top team, East Wagga, a top team, North Wagga, who are the reigning premiers and are charging, and The Rock, who were picked last week to be the premiers. So that's just keeping things in check a bit," he said.
"The games we lost were against teams high on the ladder...it's definitely not panic stations, we've just got to get back to our ways, not finger pointing or coming up with excuses, we've got to cop it on the chin and find a way to get back into it.
"If we start dropping more games then the pressure is going to get more intense."
Barellan will learn their fate over the next month. They face must-wins against Coleambally, Charles Sturt University and Northern Jets, in between a club bye.
"Every game we've got to earn," Lawder said.
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