Speaking as someone who first saw his wife 49 years ago, I would have to agree that there is such a thing as love at first sight.

However, unlike those shallow marriage shows on television, the road to our wedding day two years later took careful and rational planning. And a lot of saving.

Back then there was an expectation of respectful behaviour. Sex at that time was reserved for marriage, although the coming of the Pill was blurring tradition. Marriage was a "forever" promise, usually sealed in a solemn ceremony.

Unfortunately, the road to long-term happiness for today's young people is not quite so predictable.

In Perth 12 months ago I saw a stack of Bettina Arndt's then-latest book, #MenToo. I bought a copy. They were selling like hot cakes.

On Australia Day, Bettina Arndt was appointed as a Member of the Order of Australia (AM) for "significant service to the community as a social commentator, and to gender equity through advocacy for men".

There has been a storm of protest about her award. Victoria's Attorney-General Jill Hennessy said Ms Arndt minimises the experience of victims of sexual and family violence, and that she had defended child molesters, including former Tasmanian teacher Nicolaas Bester.

Bester repeatedly sexually assaulted his student Grace Tame when she was 15. Arndt has not tried to defend Bester's vile crime, but did defend Bester's right to study at the University of Tasmania after he completed his sentence. She has claimed in television interviews that if you are going to study the motives of criminals like paedophiles, then you are going to have to talk with some undesirable people.

Jenna Price wrote a scathing critique in the SMH. She says, "As Rosie Batty said on Sunday: 'I cannot help but be appalled that someone who minimised violence towards women... would be awarded."

However, when I read #MenToo I didn't get that impression. Arndt's not taking sides, simply exposing statistics which show that in many cases men too can face discrimination and disadvantage.

My experience in schools taught me that in family matters, there are deceptive people, including women. Like the mother who left me a little shell-shocked when she leant forward over my desk, and whispered, "He's got a different father to the other two," quickly followed by, "And me 'usband doesn't know, right?"

Arndt's book makes interesting reading. There is plenty of sexual information that men might find interesting. After all, she was a sex therapist. It is not a book that should offend women, although Arndt does quote rabid feminist Clementine Ford, who tweets comments like "Kill all men," and "All men are scum and must die."

Arndt discusses the statistics that led to the fake "rape crisis" on university campuses. Some universities established kangaroo courts to conduct campus rape cases that could "convict" on "the balance of probabilities" rather than proof.

At the end of 2019, the Queensland Supreme Court determined that universities have no jurisdiction to adjudicate sexual assault.

Investigating men's health issues led her to become more aware of various problems with men's rights - things like battles in the family court, false abuse accusations, paternity fraud, unequal health funding and the "distorted debate" over domestic violence.

Bettina Arndt's 15 years answering Cleo's advice column made her aware of paternity fraud. A common question asked by girls who wanted to have a child, but not have a father hanging around was, how could they stage a "supposed accident"?

What rights does the father have to see his child? Arndt describes cases where the male is "tricked into fatherhood" by using the contents of a condom. "Duped men are required to pay," she says.

I can understand the controversy. Arndt is working in an extremely emotionally-charged domain.

Of course there are horrible husbands out there. I've met them. But if a young man presents Friday's flowers with sincerity and respect, and his young lady has her eyes wide open to the hard work to come, they could be on their way to many happy anniversaries.