DEATH. Taxes. And all 34 players you choose in your preferred Origin teams being wrong.
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They're the three certainties in life, at least when you're a sports journalist. But although I have to paint my eyes on each morning and am yet to watch a single second of rugby league, here's who I would choose at the selection table after this weekend.*
Some selections may have been made with extreme Raiders bias.*
JARROD CROKER AT RIGHT CENTRE
But wait, he plays left centre for the Raiders. Right? So he couldn't possibly play on the right. Right?
Wrong.
It bewilders me why fans believe a professional footballer couldn't possibly switch to the other side of the field and be a success.
Besides, it's nice when good things happen to good people. When his side played Penrith in Wagga early this month, the Raiders captain gave his headgear to a jubilant young Green Machine fan.
When he learned the fan's brother was upset that he didn't get one, Croker showed up at his family's home the next morning to make it right.
What a bloke. Can also play football.
ROOKIES READY
When I was working at the Canberra Times, those working in junior development in the city were adamant Nick Cotric would prove to be the best local talent in years. Better than Duges. Better than Campo. Better than all of them.
Usually you take these claims with a grain of salt. 'Recency bias' is usually rampant with these appraisals. But the strongly-built 20-year-old is well on track to justify those claims.
Although he's played most of his 58 NRL games on the wing, he has shifted into right centre for the Raiders after Joey Leilua's season ending neck injury.
After being 18th man for the Blues last year he's ready for the next step. Right centre isn't foreign to him either - he played most of his junior footy for the Raiders there.
His Raiders teammate Jack Wighton would be my bench utility.
The boy from Orange has played every position in the back-line during his NRL career and has proven a lot of people wrong, myself included, by excelling in his move to five-eighth this year.
He is big enough to play in the back row or lock, is one of the best one on one defenders in the game and is ideal cover should injuries striek mid-game.
You wouldn't argue if they opted for him to play right centre over Croker.
NEW BLUES HALVES
Penrith's playmakers are struggling more than ScoMo (allegedly) at the Engadine Macca's in 1997.
Queensland certainly wouldn't be crapping themselves if Panthers Nathan Cleary and James Maloney kept their spots. Penrith is running last in attack, last in defence, last on the ladder. Stone motherless in virtually any stat you can throw up.
Representative teams are a reward for form and both blokes aren't fit to tie the shoelaces of Luke Keary and Cody Walker right now.
Keary is ready to play halfback at the top level. He proved that in the Roosters' grand final win last year when Cooper Cronk was a passenger with a busted shoulder, and again early this season when Cronk was out injured.
Walker has scored or assisted on more tries than the entire Panthers side this year. He also partnered with Keary in the halves when Souths won the 2014 premiership. Enough said.
MORGO'S THE MAN
Some players are victims of their own versatility. Good enough to excel in Origin at the position they play in clubland, but once the jigsaw puzzle is put together they're the last piece locked into place.
Cowboys captain Michael Morgan is the ideal example. In 2017, when Johnathan Thurston was out injured, he and Jason Taumalolo carried an injury-riddled North Queensland to the grand final.
But there's no denying how impressive Cameron Munster and Daly Cherry-Evans (injury pending) were in game three last year, and they deserve to keep their halves spots.
That leaves 'Morgo' to play in the centres, where he has already made an impact for the Maroons.
His flick pass to Dane Gagai set up the match-winning try in Origin II, 1997, when he came off the bench at right centre, saved the game for the Cane Toads.
He was superb in the decider three weeks later, setting up another try for his winger and brother-in-law Valentine Holmes.
MUNSTER MAGIC
Sure, he's been a bit wayward off the field in the past, but Cameron Munster is the man to lead Queensland this year.
Like Wally Lewis and Darren Lockyer before him, he can inspire his team in the no.6 jersey with an ability to do things on a football field few can.
He seems the type of personality who will grow an extra leg with the responsibility of the (c) beside his name.
MY ORIGIN TEAMS
QUEENSLAND: 1 Kalyn Ponga, 2 Dane Gagai, 3 Will Chambers, 4 Michael Morgan, 5 Corey Oates, 6 Cameron Munster (c), 7 Daly Cherry-Evans, 8 Josh Papalii, 9 Ben Hunt, 10 Josh McGuire, 11 Matt Gillett, 12 Felise Kaufusi, 13 Jai Arrow, 14 Anthony Milford, 15 Dylan Napa, 16 David Fifita, 17 Matt Scott.
NEW SOUTH WALES: 1 James Tedesco, 2 Nick Cotric, 3 Latrell Mitchell, 4 Jarrod Croker, 5 Josh Addo-Carr, 6 Cody Walker, 7 Luke Keary, 8 Paul Vaughan, 9 Damien Cook, 10 David Klemmer, 11 Boyd Cordner, 12 Tyson Frizell, 13 Jake Trbojevic, 14 Jack Wighton, 15 Dale Finucane, 16 Cam Murray, 17 Tariq Sims.