My dad and stepmother of nearly 10 years told us all they are getting a divorce.

I heard about the divorce from my father a few weeks ago and have not seen my stepmother since he told me.

We are being supportive to my father, but I am really unsure about what is correct with my stepmother.

Do I send an email letting her know I wish her the best and that I will cherish the time we had together?

It doesn't seem like enough though. She has been a huge part of our family.

AGONY AUNT

SORRY to hear of this upsetting upheaval in your family.

I know that many people seem to think that you just excise a family member when divorce or relationship breakdown occurs.

I don't happen to hold with that theory.

Whilst your relationship with your stepmum will by necessity change, there is no need or social requirement to discontinue contact with her.

It is very upsetting when people choose to pretend that a person no longer exists in these situations.

I would go and see her. She has been a constant in your life for ten years and deserves better.

How hurtful if you just dumped her like an unwanted puppy.

Find a new way to go forward with this lady with respect and compassion to all involved.

BOYS' CLUB

MAKE a time and go and speak with her.