BACK when I was in my 20s, I was very, very slightly involved in a child sexual abuse case.
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My name was on a list held by a man who had been charged with numerous offences.
By coincidence, I knew about the matter because I was covering the local court when this man was arrested.
But I didn’t know the arrested man, had never seen him before and, to this day, have no idea how he got my name.
Maybe he’d seen me around my home town or maybe he’d been dumpster diving and happened across old school records.
I simply have no idea.
As you might imagine, my name turning up on the list of someone charged with child sexual offences brought me into contact with the police.
Now at the time, I was a general news reporter, so I knew most of the Wagga detectives.
But knowing the detectives as a reporter and dealing with them as – from their point of view – a potential victim of child sexual abuse are two very difference things.
And I cannot speak highly enough about the compassion and professionalism of the detectives who were dealing with this matter.
They were very available; wanting to listen and ready to help.
I cannot remember now exactly what happened to the arrested man, but I clearly remember how great the detectives were.
Now, I have no clue what it feels like to be the survivor of child sexual abuse and I have no right to tell anyone how they should deal with this issue, but if I could venture one opinion, it would be to suggest that no one should be afraid of going to the police.
It’s a couple of decades since I spoke to detectives, and I’d like to the think that the community is only continuing to improve the way it helps child sexual assault survivors.
If the Royal Commission into institutionalised sexual abuse has shown us anything, it is that the damage of being assaulted was often made much, much worse by a community that turned a blind eye to the suffering of the children.
Perhaps the most heart-breaking among the many heart-breaking pieces of evidence before the commission were the stories of older people who were abused as children and either too frightened to report it or, worse still, who reported it and were not believed.
The thought of a child being sexually abused is horrible, but imagine then the added horrors of being abused and having to carry that burden alone.
Imagine having to relive that abuse without being able to seek help and talk about it. It’s appalling.
I would like to think that in this day and age, everyone would be aware that they don’t have to suffer alone.
I can understand that not every survivor wants to pursue charges and endure the rigours of our adversarial court system.
But this doesn’t mean survivors have to continue to suffer alone and in silence.
It is possible to report matters to police without electing to proceed to charges being laid and organisations like Bravehearts (bravehearts.org.au) provide some advice on places to go to seek counselling and help.
Indeed, Bravehearts’ website makes special mention of the services available to the adult survivors of abuse.
If it’s happened to you, please don’t suffer in silence if what you want to seek help.
JODY SPRINGETT
If you need help: Lifeline 13 11 14