How did you become a funeral director?

Alan Harris McDonald is family owned and the owner, who is part of my family, approached me. But it was something I had been interested in since I was about 18 years of age.

I just waited until the right time to get into it. Two and a half years ago, when I was 29, I started.

It’s a multi-faceted job isn’t it? There is just so much to what you do.

Absolutely, yes. It’s not just one thing. You’re a confidant for the family, you’re there to support them.

But you put your event planning hat on as well, and then also in the mortuary with the dressing and make-up as well.

What would you like to tell people about what you do?

People always say ‘why would you do it’ or ‘it must be a hard job’, but as I explain it, I think we’ve got the best job in the world.

We get to care for families and be there for families in the worst time of their lives and if we can make a small difference, or even a big difference, and they say thank you for making that process or that part of their lives easier, there’s no more rewarding job than that.

We get to celebrate their lives. Whether it is a tragic death at a young age or someone who’s lived to 99, to hear their stories and celebrate their lives, it’s a really rewarding career.

Funerals seem to be changing from the ‘traditional’ to really celebrating an individual.

That’s exactly right. I think gone are the days of the morbid traditional service that everyone had – or thought they had to have – now everyone is an individual. Everyone has lived a different life. It's about celebrating someone’s life.

As I say to families, whether it is indeed a tragic death of a young person or it is someone who has lived for a long time, they’ve still got stories to tell and parts of their life worth celebrating.

That’s the thing about being young in this industry, I’m trying to get our community to know that you should start talking about what you want to do to celebrate your life because it will happen one day.

We plan for everything else in life, but we don’t seem to talk about this.

We don’t talk to our families about what we want and what they want.

That’s a big thing I’d like to get into our communities: Just to talk about it. Tell your family what you would like at your funeral. It just makes the process of when a family come to us to start planning a loved one’s funeral much easier because they’re not questioning their decisions. They know what Mum or Dad or their loved one would have wanted.

They can then spend that time remembering and celebrating a loved one’s life rather than struggling with decisions that need to be made.

What are some of the stand-out moments? The special things people have done?

The ones that stick out to me are when I have dealt with a person before they have passed. They knew they were passing away and they came in to plan their whole funeral, from start to finish.

You build that relationship up and that role to fulfill every wish they had.

Some of the significant songs, special mementos in the coffin must really touch your heart.

Absolutely. I think these days, the world is kind of our oyster in regards to how we celebrate someone’s life. Our coffins can even be wrapped in photos.

The funerals that have impacted me the most have really made it about the person who has passed away.

Do you have days when you go home and think ‘well, that was tough’.

I think the adrenaline keeps you going because the reward you get from it is knowing that you’ve just helped these families. You’ve made a difference in their lives, and there’s not many jobs were you can make a difference in someone’s life in such a short period of time.

They become family. From the first time of meeting, they really become our families because they are telling you things that they don’t tell everyone.

At the end of the day, when they say ‘thank you, that was a beautiful celebration of Mum or Dad’s life’, there is no better reward.

Do you have a family of your own?

I’m married and have two little boys.

What other activities are you involved in? I believe you’re in Apex?

We’re a family who is big on giving back to the community. So I’m in Apex and president of water polo and I’m on a couple of other boards that do take up a bit of time.

My wife and kids have a great understanding of what I do and what I’m giving back either to the community or to my families and they understand they’re not first priority when families come to Alan Harris McDonald, because they see the difference we are making to other people.

What would you like at your own funeral?

You do think about that a fair bit, what you would like. I think about it for my other family members – my own mum and dad – if you happen to hear a song or something.

But for myself, I would like a celebration and stories to be told of hopefully the impact I’ve had on other people.

Hopefully through life we’ve done enough so people can stand up and tell a story of what we’ve done for them, or made a difference in someone’s life.

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