Dear Aunty,
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Love your column but I do find the boys comments quite rude and chauvinistic at times.
I have a small problem I hope you can help with.
My mother-in-law is interfering in my marriage. It’s just little things, little snide comments, things said that she doesn’t think I hear, manipulating family events and generally just being an ever-present, not-pleasant person hanging over us.
She uses our kids to get to us, forcing us to be at things we don’t want to attend, but if we don’t then the kids miss out. I really am quite fed up and actually so is my husband.
AGONY AUNT
THIS is one of the oldest tricks in the book – use the grandkids, money, or whatever you can, to control the family to achieve the outcome they want. Don’t get me wrong, there are some fantastic mothers out there too, but this is a ploy I see and hear off quite consistently.
You know what? Decide on your boundaries, deliver them to her and abide by them. Maybe your husband, her son, should go along to add weight to the conversation.
It really is that simple. Take charge of your life. If she wants to have a family event and uses your kids, just drop the kids off to her for the event – you don't need to go.
It can become a minefield navigating around mother-in-laws so tread carefully but at the end of the day nobody should do or be more than they are comfortable with.
BOYS CLUB
WE don’t think we are chauvinistic but thanks for the heads up. We’ll be sure to consider your opinion of us.
- EMAIL: aunty.agony@outlook.com
- IF YOU NEED HELP: Lifeline: 13 11 14,