LITTLE Johnny’s parents were called up to his school. With a deep sigh the principal began to speak “I don’t know how to say this; but yesterday your Johnny was caught stealing again, and this time, it was hundreds of pens from the school!”
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Little Johnny’s parents were devastated and even began to cry. “I can’t believe my boy would steal!” said his mother, “And of all things, pens!” chimed in his father “Pens! I thought that would be the very last thing he would steal!”.
The puzzled principal asked “Why would pens be the last thing he would steal?”. Little Johnny’s father replied passionately “I bring him home hundreds and hundreds of pens from my work!”
It’s amazing what an influence we have on others, especially children. Yet, I sometimes muse we are reluctant today to say anything is “wrong”; that even using the word “wrong” can be branded as being “negative”.
We hear the expressions “no limits” and “no boundaries” presented as a philosophy of life that is positive. Hmm, I’m not so sure.
A man said to me when I was very young “I’m not happy. I don’t know who I am!” I replied “You don’t know who you are? You’re you!”
I was too young to understand the existential nature of his heartfelt words.
It is not uncommon to hear the young and elderly experience the same - what 20th Century psychiatrist Erik H Erikson called “the problem of identity”.
Why are so many today troubled with “the problem of identity”?
There may be many reasons, but one is clearly the philosophy of “no limits, no boundaries”.
However, how do we know anything? By its outline, it’s boundaries.
How do we know the size of a room? By its walls.
How do we identity Australia and each state? By their boundaries, their borders.
How do we know a football field? By its lines.
Could you imagine a game of footy with no boundaries, no rules, no posts, no clock or no scoreboard? Pfft.
How do we know ourselves? By our boundaries, our limits, by having some sort of order in our life. There are those who live by no boundaries, but this way of life often ends with a jail sentence.
It is a very good thing to stretch our limits, to raise the bar, but even those dudes on You Tube doing “parkour” don’t jump off cliffs! ... Well, not many of them. They realise that even parkour has it’ limits.
A mother of young children advised me “Always shut the farm gate or the sheep will stray and the foxes get them”.
Boundaries become most significant when considering children. In a world where children can and are caught up in an emotional, physical and spiritual shipwreck if their boundaries are crumbling, it is important that firm boundaries are set to ensure that the child grows with confidence and knowledge to tackle life’s challenges.
If you’ve ever had a written contract or tenure dishonoured on you, you become a devoted fan of boundaries very quickly. Liars, despots, dictators, cult-leaders and corruption all show that a world with uncertain boundaries and laws is anything but beautiful.
God only sets boundaries for us so that we can know our true identity and our true destination, not to rob us of love and freedom.
If we do not know our boundaries, how can we know our true identity?