Since her twenties,  the successful businesswoman went through periods where she was paralyzed by bad thoughts and “constantly feeling down”. 

But Ms Metcalfe only realised she had depression when a relationship ended and job pressure forced a breakdown at 28. 

“I was put into a really stressful position at work where my boss had left, and so I was having to do his work as well as mine,” she said.

“It was when I had actually made the decision and put in my resignation that the last week of work I couldn’t do it.

“I fell in a heap and was just crying all the time, I didn’t want to see anyone.”  

In the years that followed, Ms Metcalfe continued to have a successful career in book keeping and business management.

She split her months between working in the Northern Territory and Wagga, where she married and had two kids.

But the bad bouts persisted where Ms Metcalfe would become crippled by depression, often triggered by a lack of sleep or stressful situations.

“Everything was very inward focused and horrible thoughts going through my head all the time,” she said.

“I could never explain what was wrong, there was never anything wrong. That was what was so frustrating about it.” 

It wasn’t until Ms Metcalfe was in her forties that she made the decision to seek help and see a psychiatrist.

Since then, the 50-year-old hasn’t been depressed in six years. 

“Education is a part of it,” Ms Metcalfe said. 

I accept that I will probably have to take medication for the rest of my life, it’s just the way that my brain is.”

Ms Metcalfe is sharing her story for mental health month and to encourage people to seek help.

She also shares her story as part of her voluntary work on mental health organisation Riverina Bluebell’s committee. 

“It’s very hard to see that light when you are in the pits of depression,” she said.

“You just have to get through one day at a time and know that it will pass.” 

Beyond Blue 1300 224 636 

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